Seafield Goss By J.Lim and C.Ryan

Hi people!!
Welcome back to another TORTUROUS session of Seafield G, where you'll be forced to listen to two girld talking about their CRAP school and how to escape its crappiness.
Well..today's lesson *snores* will be about..
*music*
HOW TO ESCAPE PEER PRESSURE.
Here's a few don't and do's to *hopefully* get you into the right crowd.
DON'T
~Wear glasses and breathe an inhaler in a library. It'll make you look like a super-nerd.
~EVER. EVER. GO STREAKING.
~REPLACE THE SCHOOL WALLS WITH POTATOES. *remember the last time that happened?*
~Talk crap in front of the teacher. They'll just stare at you like you're insane.

And now for the fun part! The do's!
DO'S
~Wear a clown wig and walk around the school holding a horn. You're an instant chick magnet!
~Cover the whole school with pizza dough. No school equals more time in the mall!
~ Put a whoopee cushion under someone's chair. Let the fun begin!
None of these seem to be funny though..
You aren't laughing..are you?
TOLD YOU IT WAS TORTUROUS!!

~~[S]~~[E]~~[A]~~[F]~~[I]~~[E]~~[L]~~[D]~~[G]~~[O]~~[S]~~[S]~~

Hey dudes and dudettes! If you're wondering what time it is..well guess!! WRONG!! Well I'll tell you what time is it, because of my supreme superiority..it's time for...
*drumroll please*
*triumphiant music*
*army marching*
*bottle opening*
*trumpet blowing*
*float parade*
*toiletbowl flushing*
*extreme trumpeting*
*out of breath*
*GASP*
Well I'd better continue before I choke to death.
SMK SEAFIELD GOSS WITH J.LIM AND C.RYAN!!
Hint: our names are censored so that people won't find out who we are when we expose the shocking truth behind Seafieldians' lives.
I bet you 5 bucks you can't find out who we are. So there.
DON'T FIND OUT!!!

Okay..enough for the intro.I bet you're only here because you want to know about the Goss..right?! Wrong!! Wait till I finish my INTRO!!
Okaay.. I'm done.
Ready for the ugly truth?!
*trumpets*
Yeah yeah I know. Enough with the trumpets.
Moving on..

*camera centers around a Seafieldian*
Note: Names are changed to protect privacy.

Us: Hey person!
Toiletroll: Yeah?
Us: How do you feel about the exams? Do you think the exams are hiding something sinister..an evil plot maybe?
Toiletroll: *in hushed whispers* They're watching my every move!!
Us: who?
Toiletroll: The teachers!! They purposely set up this exam..so that they can find the smart ones. Then the ask the top scoters in the exam to find them to get their 'reward'. Well I have did some research about the reward..and it turns out that isn't a reward at all!!
Us: Then what is it?
Toiletroll: Shh..you really musn't know. But I'll tell you. The teachers ask the student to go into a room..and suck all the knowledge out from their brain..and put it in their own!! Now you know why teachers are smart or know a lot. The smarter a teacher is..the more brains they have taken from students.
Us: Then what happens to the student?
Toiletroll: You really don't want to know. The students get reprogrammed into teachers pets,with no mind of their own. Exactly like a zombie.
Us: Thanks for the info. Hey..how did you know all this stuff anyway?
Toiletroll: BECAUSE I'M ONE OF THEM!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Us: AARGH!!!!!!! *runs away and drops camera*
*camera
smashes into little bits*
That's why there's no video..in case you were wondering.
Yeah and that's a true story.So BEWARE!!